Things to remember in the first trimester

Supporting Podcast Episode HERE

The first trimester is the first day of your last period until the end of the 12th week

Let’s take a look at what is going on. Progesterone levels increase after ovulation. If you become pregnant, progesterone levels will continue to rise. If you do not become pregnant your progesterone levels will go down and your period will begin. This rise in progesterone will have a number of effects on your body, to put it simply, progesterone is the pregnancy hormone and it wants you to slow down and create a cozy space for the egg to develop, it also keeps the uterus muscle relaxed and helps the immune system tolerate foreign DNA. For the first 10 weeks the corpus luteum (a mass of cells that forms in an ovary) produces progesterone and after this the placenta takes over. This is when you may start to notice any symptoms start to fade.

You may experience cramping when the embryo attaches to the uterine walls, this is called implantation and happens around 6-12 days after conception. As your blood and life force nourish your womb, you may notice a downwards shift in energy. This paired with the rise in progesterone, estrogen and hCG may bring sensations of heaviness in the body, bloating, dizziness and tiredness. You are being called home, back to your body. The brain fog may come as you try to use your brain power to untangle the world around you, your baby takes priority, this is happening consciously and unconsciously.

After 8 weeks I noticed spotting, so I went to the hospital. This was when I had my first scan, that moment was when I realized birthing within the system I had available in France was not going to serve me. The doctor asked me to take off my underwear and open my legs, he then inserted his fingers into me and did an internal scan. Oh, and half way through he decided he would take a phone call and then get up and leave, I lay there exposed and vulnerable, with no idea if my baby was ok. I was alone and stripped of my dignity. I wasn’t told about the risks of an internal or ultrasound . I was just sent on my way with a photo. At the time I was in France, and as it wasn’t my first language so I was just getting by. At that moment I knew I wanted to be away from the clinical setting. Everything was ok, but I was left with a bitter taste in my mouth. On a positive note, this was the first time I saw her, it finally felt real. I could see her little arms and legs. This was the moment Ilan connected to a reality as a family of 3. It was such a relief.

By the end of the first trimester, your baby has all their organs, muscles, limbs and bones in place, and the sex organs are well developed. How incredible, it still blows my mind to think of how much can develop in such a short period of time!

So I want to say….Congratulations! A soul has entered your sacred womb, a soul with its own mission has chosen you to be it’s guide to light the way to earth. Whether your pregnancy was planned, delayed or a huge surprise, a soul has now blessed you as it’s mother. You are exactly what they need and they are exactly what you need. You are not alone on your journey, each moment is now a joint experience. This makes me think of how our genes and epigenetics tell a story of our past relatives, how we were also inside of our grandmother as she nurtured our mother in her womb! All the memories and wisdom we hold within us is utterly incredible. That’s why if you become still enough to listen, you will hear the tender voices of your elders and ancestors.

Taking a moment to pause to send love and gratitude to all the wombs which created the path which we walk on today.

From the moment I conceived I naturally found comfort in communicating with Auraya, although I could feel a solid independence from this soul. It was as though we were both very aware that she didn't belong to me but I would create a safe and nourishing haven for her to grow. She rocked my world, she had a fiery energy that knew what she wanted. She wouldn’t let me bypass anything and it’s no surprise that I changed my life so dramatically.

How is body, mind and soul today?

hCG is a hormone produced by trophoblast cells that are surrounding the growing embryo, which eventually forms the placenta and what is measured in the pregnancy tests. It plays a big part in many of the physical, emotional and mental changes you may be experiencing. For each mother pregnancy will be different. There are simple ways to support your body to cleanse and replenish during this time, which may have a positive effect on any symptoms you are experiencing.

We covered these areas in more details in the previous chapters, but as a gentle reminder:

• Stay hydrated, check the color of your urine

• Eat clean, avoiding sugars, processed foods, alcohol and unnecessary drugs

• Stay active, keep your energy flowing

• Rest, enjoy as much QUALITY sleep as possible

• Stay anchored, come back to the heart again and again

• Healthy boundaries

During the first trimester I was under a lot of stress trying to decide what I would do with my business, I had sickness but mainly in the evenings. My intention was to keep my body as healthy as possible even if I couldn't control my emotions on most days. I would walk everyday, practice yoga every morning and journal to Auraya, I tried so hard to experience a connection with her but it was tough, she felt so far away. I came to realize that I didn't need the experience of being connected, we were connected on the deepest level and the experience of that was for the mind.

Journaling. For me it is hard to remember the first trimester. So I was so happy to come across my journal as I wrote this. It felt like I was reading about someone else's life. It may feel like another thing to do but dedicating 5 minutes to writing, even if it isn't pretty, can be very healing and insightful.

A question I loved to ask:

“What have you come to teach me today and how can I support you better tomorrow?”

Throughout this time, notice what takes over your mind. I spent so much time focusing on my pelvic floor strength, I was obsessed and I avoided thinking about a plan B. I challenged all my fears with love, but on the flip side I was only connecting to the fears which I knew I could understand and overcome. The real fears were deep in my subconscious and only arose as I entered the final stages of labor. We will talk about all this through the book. Connecting to a wise woman who can sieve out the noise with all the answers you will find will support you in hearing your own truth.

Healthy Boundaries. We covered this in a previous blog so the emphasis on this section is on sharing your news. This is a very sacred time for you and your family and it may feel better for you to hold back from sharing. It’s common to hear of people waiting until the second trimester, this is when the risk of early pregnancy loss drops significantly, but what really matters is that you are comfortable sharing. Just remember, as soon as you make the announcement, you will have people asking questions and offering opinions, of course this is when healthy boundaries come in. You do not owe anyone any answers and you can decline to listen to their opinions in a gentle way if you feel they may be triggering.

One of the most popular questions may be “when are you due?'' We will go deeper into this in another chapter, but putting emphasis n a due date which is usually 4% accurate will add unnecessary pressure. Try using birthing seasons "My baby is due in the spring season"

When we found out we were pregnant, we were staying in Canada close to Ilan's parents. We were having our last meal as a family before we left for France. At this point Ilan was not 100% convinced about the pregnancy, also I had only met his family 3 times. Sat at the table, celebrating Shabbat, he filled his fork, took a deep breath and announced “oh, Danielle is pregnant”. I wanted to die. All eyes on me. If it wasn't for the fact that I froze I think I would have ran away, leaving behind my shoes! I was so upset that he did this, but his family were very supportive and comforting. It took a lot for me to understand why he would do it this way, but I know it wasn't meant to harm me. I told my mum as soon as I found out, I felt so alone and needed her support, and she’s my best friend. She helped me to stay clear headed and strong throughout. I announced the pregnancy at 12 weeks, but on reflection I think this was to make it feel more real for us both and to stop Ilan living in limbo.

Stepping onto the bridge. This is the first step onto the bridge leading you to motherhood, a step towards the unknown. A step away from everything which you have identified with. All the emotions and feelings which arise are perfectly normal. Through our time together I will ask you questions to remind you of the wisdom you have within and I will offer comfort through stories and simple practices. Now is the time to start knowing what it means to practice self love, now is the time to start practicing asking for support.

Exercise. Write a list of all the women in your life who inspire you, all the wise and wonderful women. Why did you choose them?

MEDITATION

Welcoming you new VIP guest

This is a beautiful practice alone or with your partner, if you are well past your first trimester and even if you are 10 years postpartum, this meditation can be used as a regression practice to guide you back to this time. I have even known of families to practice if they are trying to conceive.

Find a time where you will not be disturbed and you can safely retreat from the external world. Ensure your environment is welcoming, warm and clean. Carry out any rituals to prepare you space and body before you start.

Set an intention. ”Until the end of this meditation I will come back to my body again and again, even if I notice I have drifted away with thoughts which are not intended for this practice”

Find a comfortable position. Where the body can completely let go and the spine is aligned.

Connecting to your womb. Breathing with your womb until you feel yourself drop into this space.

Create. Use your senses to connect to your baby. You may feel an energy within, you may visualize, you may hear their voice. Whatever feels comfortable to you.

Connect. “Welcome to your new home dear child, feel the warmth and comfort of my womb surrounding you, hear the beat of my heart and know you are safe. Your placenta will be with

you too, offering you nourishing gifts. I am listening to you, I feel you. Is there anything you need? How can I best support you?……… (this is your time to share and listen)”

Dedicate at least 15 minutes to this practice.

When you have finished, journal your experience, were there any requests, fears, messages? Connect with your partner if they were present and exchange experiences.

I hope this was of some comfort to you, I would love to connect!

Blessings,

Danielle